Grief – an intense sorrow especially caused by someone’s death.
Another definition says grief is “keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss”.
Grief doesn’t only occur when we mourn the loss of loved ones.
I spent the first half of this year in deep mourning for the loss of my health. There were many days of tears, anxiety and numbness. Although at the time, I hadn’t realised that I was experiencing grief. Even now even as I trust in the Lord for wholeness, although I’m no longer ill, I still find myself mourning the loss of the smile that I always took for granted.
In one way or the other, we are all grieving in 2020 due to the river of woe has swept the globe in the form of the COVID-19 pandemic. We are mourning the loss of what had been and what could be as we share in the collective loss of normalcy. Some of us are also grieving the loss of loved ones, jobs, businesses, or health just to name a few.
Grieving is individualised and more often than not, solitary. But as we grieve and mourn, we can take comfort in knowing that we do not serve an unfeeling, remote God who cannot or does not sympathise with our groanings.
Psalm 56:8 lets us know that God so much values each tear that we shed, that He make a record of each one. He cares and mourns with us. ‘You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book’.
And in what is the shortest but perhaps the most powerful phrase in the bible, John 11:35 tells us that, ‘Jesus wept’ over the death of Lazarus. Furthermore, Isaiah 53:4 describes Him as ‘…a man of sorrows acquainted with grief’. Jesus is familiar with grief. So who best to understand us when we are deep in the throes of grief?
Even so, as we mourn we should remember that we are not unlike those without hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Grieve knowing that you are not alone. Grieve knowing that God is still in control despite appearances to the contrary.
A good example of this is in 1 Samuel 30. David and his men had returned home to Ziklag to find that their enemies had invaded the town, burnt everything and carried off their wives and children! Can you imagine coming home from work and finding that your family had been kidnapped? Not surprisingly, David and his men were deeply grieved. The bible says ‘…they wept until they were too exhausted to weep’ (1 Samuel 30:4).
But then things got even worse for David. His men turned on him. They blamed him for their misfortune and threatened to stone him. Not only was he still deep in the throes of grief but now he was facing 600 valiant, angry and embittered men who wanted his blood.
David’s response may surprise many of us.
1 Samuel 30:6 says, ‘…but David encouraged himself in the Lord’. Wow.
There’s another example of how David coped with grief in 2 Samuel 12:15-22. He had spent days fasting, crying and pleading with God to spare his baby son all to no avail. His son died. His behaviour whilst the child was ill had so much concerned and worried his household staff that they didn’t even know how to break the news to him.
However, his response when he found out would probably surprise many of us again.
1 Sam 12:20, ‘So David arose from the ground, washed and anointed himself, and changed his clothes; and he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. Then he went to his own house; and when he requested, they set food before him, and he ate’ (2 Samuel 12:20 NKJV).
I found it interesting that he went to God even before he ate, bearing in mind that he hadn’t eaten for days. I daresay David was still deeply mourning his loss but even in the midst of his grief, he remembered that he wasn’t alone.
I want to leave you with the below scriptures as a reminder and encouragement that you are also not alone in your grief.
Scriptures to remind and encourage you that God is present with you even as you grieve
- ‘Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you’. I Peter 5:6-7 NKJV
- ‘The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, And saves such as have a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, But the Lord delivers him out of them all’. Psalms 34:18-19 NKJV
- ‘God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, Even though the earth be removed, And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea…’. Psalms 46:1-2 NKJV
- ‘The Lord upholds all who fall, And raises up all who are bowed down’. Psalms 145:14 NKJV
- ‘Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted’. Matthew 5:4 NKJV
- ‘He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds’. Psalms 147:3 NKJV
This post was originally written for Five Minute Friday but may also be linked up at these places.
(Image credit: Jennifer Griffin from Unsplash)
We do not serve an unfeeling, remote #God who cannot sympathise with our groanings. He grieves with us when we grieve. Share on X
Love your tweet and Bible stories. Thanks for reminding me the importance of going to God first. Amen.
Jennifer, FMF Neighbor
“Surely he has borne our grief and carried our sorrows…”
Singing these words from Handel’s Messiah quietly in my heart today.
This morning I’m singing that old hymn, “…what a friend we have in Jesus all our sins and griefs to bear”. Comforting.
Yes, comforting indeed.
Thank you for all of the lovely Biblical reassurances in our grief! I will include your continued healing – and your smile – in my prayer today. Karen (FMF #9)
I hope your health is good now. This reminds me of of revelation where God wipes our tears. God bless x
It’s much better Loretta, thanks for asking and improving everyday! Blessings x
Thanks Karen! 🙂 x
I just started FMF today. I like the way you mingle your 5 minutes with bible truths. Clever.
Thank you for reading and commenting Lestie. Welcome to FMF:)
What a journey, so glad for God’s faithfulness and compassion. Thank you for sharing your journey and heart.
Thank you for commenting!
I wonder if it might be better for our society if we had a way of expressing our sorrow, a modern “sackcloth and ashes.” Even if it were just in our Christian traditions. It would normalize grief, and therefore allow us to work through the process more openly. Thank you for giving me something to think about.
Amie, FMF #16
He has experienced every grief … #7
Something must be wrong with me,
for I don’t grieve the passing year
that made such awful history,
but I shed not a single tear
’cause, to me, well ,that’s just life.
You take the rough days with the smooth,
you take the peace and hellish strife,
and some you win, dude, some you lose.
There’s lots that, yeah, might have been,
but as of now, they’re not,
and though the mourning’s not a sin,
it’s best that we forgot
all the futures that are gone,
and saddle up, and just ride on.
Amen Wemi. Thank you for such a powerful post. This really resonated with me today. Blessings to you.
Visit from FMF#15
I’m glad Paula. Blessings x
“Grieving is individualised and more often than not, solitary. But as we grieve and mourn, we can take comfort in knowing that we do not serve an unfeeling, remote God who cannot or does not sympathise with our groanings.”
Amen! So thankful for this reassurance. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for consistently grounding your posts in Scripture. Blessings.
Oh Wemi … What a powerful thing it is to “encourage ourselves in the Lord,” especially during an intense season of grief. The loss of the way things used to be is, indeed, a significant loss. Thank you for these wonderful verses that show how our Savior knows what we are feeling and experiencing and is with us in our grief.
Lois, it is powerful indeed…I just have to remember that I have it at my disposal. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Wemi – This was beautiful. I am currently working on a book on grief. I would love to interview you in 2021. Thank you for sharing with Grace & Truth Link-Up. Maree
Maree, I’d be glad to help! Let me know when you’re ready 🙂 Thank you for reading and commenting. Blessings
Wemi,
What a beautiful and deeply moving post. I will be going back to meditate on the scriptures you shared. Each one speaks of God’s nearness in our grieving. May you have a peace-filled Thanksgiving!
Blessings,
Bev xx
Happy Thanksgiving Bev!
Wemi, this is beautiful. Thank you for the reminders that, in our grief, we are not alone. I have two friends who have recently lost someone close to them and my heart is aching for these two women. I’m still grappling with the enormity of the feelings. But God . . . And thank you for the reminder that there are different kinds of grief. I’m so thankful we can comfort ourselves in the Lord in those times when we mourn losses.
Praying God’s comfort for you and your friends Jeanne.
Even after years of living with grief and my broken heart, I need these scriptures and the truths they contain. I need the reminders – especially at the holidays. Thank you for sharing.
Hugs Jennifer, thankful for a God that doesn’t leave us alone. Happy Thanksgiving x
I hope your health is better now, Wemi. I think you are right – a lot of us suffered grief this year due to the pandemic. Grief for our lost way of life, grief for the loss of freedom, grief for the severed connections between friends and family. I am reading through the OT right now and just began reading Lamentations. This post fits right in with my reading!
Yes, it certainly feels like a year of lamentations, doesn’t it? Thankful we have Jesus to bear our griefs!
There has been a lot of grief this season! Even unexpected grief such as the loss of traditional activities during our Christmas season. Thanks for sharing, especially the scripture passages, that bring us the balm for our grief!
Yes, yes, I fully understand grieving the loss of our health even as we’re grieving the loss of loved ones and living with anticipatory grief. I am so grateful that God is strong, comforting, hope-filled, gracious.
He is our Healer, Wemi, isn’t He …